Should you have a private wedding ceremony or a big celebration or both?
I recently met a couple for a private wedding ceremony. Actually, it was a commitment ceremony. This awesome couple has been together for 29 years and they are planning their wedding and a big celebration in their hometown in Belgium. However, they came to Las Vegas and wanted to do something private, just the two of them. So they planned the commitment ceremony.
The ceremony was beautiful and they are so much in love. They exchanged vows and rings and committed to always being there for each other. They had a photographer for pictures and planned a romantic dinner, just the two of them.
This is the second private ceremony I have done recently and it got me thinking. Many girls dream of their wedding day with a big white dress and all of their family and friends. They spend hours making plans for the ceremony and reception sites and want to ensure it is perfect for their guests. They may or may not put a lot of thought into the ceremony, it gets lost in the party planning. But of course, the ceremony is the real start of your married life together.
Have you thought about a private moment?
Each couple has their own unique idea for the perfect wedding. And that is ok because this is your day and you are making YOUR memories. I just encourage you to plan a few moments for private time together on your wedding day.
Most couples are nervous during the ceremony, especially if all of their family and friends have joined them to celebrate the occasion. My ceremony style is to have the couple each repeat after me for their vows and before the ceremony, many people share with me that they are nervous that they will ‘mess up the vows’. No matter how much I try to reassure them, sometimes nerves take over.
So as I talk to my couples about why they fell in love, I encourage them to write a paragraph to the other about what they love about their future spouse. Then they send these paragraphs to me separately so their intended does not see it. I review the paragraphs to ensure they will be easy to say and that they ‘flow’ and the two have the same style. You don’t want one to be totally serious and the other to be nothing but humor unless that is who they are as people. I print the paragraphs on cards and hand them to each partner after they say their vows. Since what is said is a surprise for their partner, I find the nervousness goes away and this is a very heartfelt and sometimes emotional time of the ceremony. At that moment, there is no one else around but the two of them. Consider adding a private moment to your ceremony.